Sadistically inviting.

First day of class yesterday. It was a mad rush to get from work to class on time, and I had to literally chase my boss out of his office so that I can leave. With only twenty minutes to class, I figured I had to get a cab cos I wasn't going to run the distance from the station to class. I'd be lying flat in class!

Well, shan't go into that despite the extremely bad experience with the cabby. He had me alight a 5 minutes walk from my destination. I was ready to bonk him on his head with my huge bag and stomp off in exasperation.

Class was fun, though the first half of the class was spent trying hard to focus and getting work out of my mind. The lecturer made lesson fun and enjoyable. Praise my lucky stars! First lesson and we got our first project. I foresee myself pulling more hair out of my head!

Dear, it's okay. I understand. I'm happy for you that he's being so nice now.

I must admit, the long walk to the bus stop and the long ride home was kind of....rejuvenating in some sense. Rolled many thoughts and emotions through my mind, coming to terms and digesting everything that has happened and is happening. That felt good.

Now with work piling up, both the International and the Asia Pacific Conference coming up, school and projects starting again, and I'm reviving my driving lessons which have been in a state of comatose for far too long, it actually makes me feel happy.

Like he says, "It's good to get 2 out of the 1001 things I have to do in my life."

Nonetheless, it's extremely draining and I spend half the time wishing for weekends to come and stay for good. I'm waiting for the chance to go somewhere, sleep the weekend away, to basically, hibernate.

Yes, this isn't Soulfood anymore. No more of that child's play. No more of that kind of fun, peace and laughter. Still having fun, laughter and once in a while peace. But I'm enjoying it, in an odd way.

Sadistic.

On a very freaky note, I was at my void deck reaching home after class, when I glanced up to my unit, something I do out of habit. I distinctly saw a man standing outside my door looking downstairs. I didn't think much of it, assumed it was my dad or a neighbour or some unknown man standing outside. Nothing surprising, considering my block is known for having weird people and happenings. When I went up, I didn't see anyone.

It was until much later that I realised, it was pretty much impossible to have someone stand at that position due to the arrangement of furniture, so to speak, at my doorstep.

Question: Who is that man?

This morning, I was thinking through, it hit me that perhaps, the furniture was thrown away. I absolutely cannot remember. That is how dysfunctional my mind is now. Try as I might, I can't recall.

So, it's now, either there really is a man there, for whatever reason I cannot fathom. Or, was there a "man" there?

Naturally or supernaturally, I choose to live in ignorance. I'd rather not know.