Dear So and So

Appear that the letter wars are starting once again. It just makes my tummy churn and my heart sink when I try so hard to push myself to go on, and yet, it all boils down to nothing. I do have my priorities set straight. The only issue here is, my priorities are nothing like what you expect my priorities be and just because this is the case, you conclude I'm in the wrong frame of mind. It will always boil down to this. ALWAYS.

Somehow, its not the big issues that get to you, cos we've all learnt to deal and manouveur ourselves round these obstacles. Instead, its the nitty gritty details that pile up into one whole ball of mess that irks and weighs you down.

One leads to another and then to another and this whole ball of mess seems to be impossible to handle. We've all been there.

You're never alone, and tons out there are in a worse situation than you are. We all learn to lean on each other for support. Nonetheless, some of these so called "support" can actually bring you down even further.

When an entity brings about tears, look to another entity for that smile.

A night out with my girls makes it easier for me to lift myself up.
A nice dinner with my guy makes my day.
A simple message from someone close can make me smile.
A smile from you makes it all seem worthwhile.
A hug can be healing.

With all these, it may just be a temporary escape to our own protected world, where everything is right, and everything is the way we want it. But why not? If this little escape can give us that tiny little push that perhaps is all we need to succeed? Even if we don't, we have moved a step ahead.

"Focusing on someone else's problem can make your own seem so much less significant. As such, your problems become so much easier to handle. It's just a matter of getting over yourself." (Yes Errol, this line worked wonders for me.)

When it all gets too tough, take a break, have a kit kat, or MacDonald meal for that matter, anything that works for you, just to rejuvenate and find your focus once again. Well, a tub of chocolatey ice cream can create miracles, for me that is.

I used to write in diaries. ALOT. Until I ran out of time. Or naps on bus rides seem to make more sense then jiggly writing in diaries. Or when its easier to type it all out cos the computer's my best friend now. I never throw these diaries away. I take them out once in a while, read it through, and have a good laugh about it. It's really amazing to realise how those impossible mountains to climb seem to just be molehills when you look back.

Like the time the O Levels was killing me, and I thought I would never made it through. Well, I did.

Like the time I was camping in my living room for one week for projects' sake, I thought I would never complete them despite sleeping just an hour a day for a week, staring at the screen to find that tiny little comma in the entire program that would make a great difference. WELL, I did, just not as well as I would have liked it to be.

Like the time I fried my thumb in boiling oil, I was wailing buckets. Now, I think its amusing.

Oh yes, and the time we were peeling oranges by the cartons everyday. I was working 16 hour shifts and dreaming about peeling oranges the remaining 8. I felt I smelt orangey no matter how much I bathed. I'm VERY sure I don't now.

The time when I was 5 and my dad when for reservist training on my birthday. I thought the army didn't like me and was punishing me. I BAWLED. Now, I wish he would go back to reservist training.

How bout the time I fell on my butt, and for that moment, I couldn't feel my legs. I was convinced I was going to be paralysed waist down. I felt extremely dumb after that. Stop reminding me.

Things happen for a reason and there's a reason why we're given harder tasks to accomplish. That's because we are capable of succeeding, and coming out unscathed.


I shall go think of a response to the letter I found on my bed last night.

Here goes...

Dear Mother,

Thank you for your letter.

With regards to your claims and accusations, I'm sorry to inform you that they are completely without basis. Kindly obtain more concrete information before giving feedback.

Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Thank you and best regards,

Your Daughter