sometimes i wonder. do all things happen for a reason? a reason we're never meant to know, but it still happens. put myself in her shoes. my ex-bf (he still is my bf thank gdness) whom i still have feelings for gets another gf. i know i wont go back to him even if he stills want me back. but it still feels awful. man...that feeling is terrible.
you may think of death as a solution my dear, but dying because you hate yourself isnt going to be a solution. no matter what, you're still gonna be remembered for who you are cos you were like that. dying wont change that. it wont change anything except cease your physical existence, not you in other people's heart. death may be a release for you, ever imagined the lifelong suffering and torture other people who really care about you are going to have? dont be selfish. dont think only of yourself. whether you like it anot, one can never live for oneself. its a fact. an unchangeable fact.
i wish i have a bf who can cook. i honestly do. i have always dreamt of having my boyfriend cook something for me while I wait. well, dreams are never reality. so...it shall remain a dream. buried and unsaid.
i think i think too much. i think even in my sleep. its too exhausting. i can scare the hell out of myself. i think my brain is exploding. i'm taking up too much brain juice.
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